All this being tired of being tired…all this seeking and trying to get somewhere.
This ridiculous anxiety, this feeling of inadequacy, never doing enough, never being enough.
This pain left me. It aches, as a mourning of losing someone that you were very attached to.
Nevertheless, it feals good. I am allowed to enjoy life. I am allowed to be. I am allowed to be content.
Contenment doesn’t mean you stop growing, it means you allow the growing to anchor in happiness and not in pursuit.
It means not so much as feeling lucky, but more as feeling blessed.
Something shifted. Something was let go. Just Being came in.
I AM BLESSED. I AM BLESSED.
When did this happen? I can’t pinpoint the moment that I realized that all this stubbornness that I had felt all my life, was my soul speaking up. That it wasn’t me failing.
It was ME screaming, standing up to the world. And this wasn’t a negative characteristic, it was a very protective one which has saved me from possible harm many times. So, thank you stubbornness/soul.
I am blessed....
I am blessed.
Again, I don’t know when it hit me….
I DON’T have to be good at everything and I DON’T have to be really good at something to enjoy it. Not everything has to be mastered, not everything has to be taught.
It can simply be enjoyed. Felt. Loved.
All this growth, this being aware of being aware of being aware. The watcher, the mirrors, the Source…yes, I am paying attention.
And you know, I get it, I really do. I love you, I am thankful and I am aware. I surrender.
Because you know what, all other options are just exhausting. Let’s BE again. Let’s BE.
I AM curious about this surrendering part of my life. The struggle, the wanting, the seeking have brought me a lot, but now it’s about letting life unfold…what does the Universe has planned for me? What does this “I AM” have planned for me?
Let's explore...
I will keep you posted…
